'Holidazzle' by Ravyn LaRue

I really hate growing up
I left all I've ever known and loved
And now I am lost
And I try to bring myself the comfort of childhood
Buying juice boxes and fruit snacks
Tucking myself into big warm blankets
And making sure to zip up my coat
Even if I'm in a hurry
But I cannot mother myself
And this is no good
Mama informs me of the goings on back home
My friends are moving away
And going on vacations to glorious places
My brother is failing school yet again
And the Holidazzle parade will be no more
I almost cried at the latter
Which is stupid
I haven't taken time to go since I was twelve or so
But it means a lot now
Since it represents home and childhood
Two things I yearn for and have no grasp of here
I really hate growing up
My friends are getting married and I'm not even nineteen
But I will be in a week
And I want to revert
I want to do as my brother does
Go back to making paper snowflakes
And going to pumpkin patches
All the heart of Arts and Crafts has been removed
No one cares about the emotion of their own stories or pictures
They just want it to be seen as right
And I want to go back to a world without rights and wrongs
Home was a slur of beautiful colors
And here is black and white and seen as pretty by adults
It isn't at all lovely to me
I really hate growing up